How do you find motivation to get homework done? -Lord of Geese

Dear Lord of Geese, 

This is a tough one and something I’m struggling with as a term four senior. There are a few different ways to think about it. Ask yourself why you don’t feel motivated: is it the content? Is it busy work? Is it too difficult? 

 You could think about how great it would be not to have homework after school. Visualizing the relief that you will have at the end of the day is sometimes enough to motivate you to complete those harder assignments. Utilize the fact that you are in a space of learning; you can work in spaces like the library and the Schawbel Center (if you are a junior or senior). Do NOT work next to your friends. Separate yourself and think about how you will be able to have fun with them after finishing homework. 

You can also consider the big picture. With every homework assignment you finish, you get closer to life beyond high school. If you struggle with getting your homework done as an underclassman, talk to your guidance counselor about your course selection and taking classes that are both challenging and enjoyable. If you are an incoming junior or senior, there is time at the beginning of the year to switch your classes if they aren’t the best fit for you. 

If visualizing your future doesn’t work for you, trick yourself using a reward system. Reward yourself with talking to your friends or a sweet treat. What I wouldn’t recommend is punishing yourself because that will make you hate homework more. Prioritizing your mental health is important and many teachers will be willing to work with you to ensure that you are alright. You can talk to a trusted teacher, and your guidance counselor is always a safe choice. 

Best, 

Emilia

How should I force another to do a group project (or an Argo article) when they don’t want to do it (cough cough). this guy didn’t write anything, and i’m mad >:(((((( -Anonymous

Dear >:((((((,

I have definitely experienced this in group projects. There are a few ways out of it and it depends how much you care about the other person.

If they are just a random classmate who is difficult to work with, there is nothing wrong with telling your partner or editor that your partner didn’t do any work. Google Docs has revision history, which makes it easy to form a compelling argument. This may help you get a better grade and the recognition that you deserve. 

However, if they are a mutual friend or someone that you don’t want to upset, you have to let it go. My dad has told me that there are people like this, even in his Harvard biostatistician world, so it’s safe to say that difficult people are just a part of life. If they are consistently unresponsive when you ask them to do work, you have to accept it and just do your best. Don’t overwork yourself, though!

Best wishes,

Mary

I’m in love with someone who is aro-ace. What do I do? -Short

Dear Short,

As someone who was actually broken up with because my ex realized they were aro-ace, I have some experience with this one. Although I don’t hold the identity myself, I’ve learned that aro-ace people (and people in general) each experience their sexuality differently. For clarification, asexuality is experiencing a lack of sexual attraction and aromanticism is experiencing a lack of romantic attraction. Each person, however, may experience varying levels or types of attraction.

I know it seems awkward and uncomfortable, but if you’re really interested in this person, you need to tell them how you feel. I would first ask them if they’re okay with discussing your change in emotions, but the conversation is also for you to figure out if you can have a compatible relationship with them. It is important to have your needs satisfied in a relationship. If this discussion makes it seem like the relationship will be filled with difficult compromises and miscommunication, you should consider if friendship is a better option.

By no means will telling this person your feelings result in having to remain just friends. It’s the same as any other person. You need to determine what each of you will be able to contribute to the relationship and decide if it is one you want to pursue. It is true that some people are just not compatible, but I have hope for you and your love.

Best of luck,

Mary